When you embark on the journey of self-employment, you may well find that criticism hurts even more than usual.
It’s different from when you’re doing work that’s unfulfilling. By pursuing your passion, you’re naturally more invested in the work and perhaps less able to brush off negative comments. Criticism from others can feel like it attacks your core sense of self more deeply.
So how do you handle criticism, when you’re doing what you love? Click below to find out in my first ever video blog:
While you’re over there, do subscribe to my PassionToProfit channel on YouTube so that you can be updated on future video blogs.
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© Corrina Gordon-Barnes, 2011
Excellent video! I love the idea of shining a light on it rather than hiding away from any criticism!
Wow, I love the video! And what you say is so wise and wonderful.
How do I respond to criticism? Not very well at all! Although perhaps the criticism I had this year has led me to review some of the ways I work and probably made it better – although I think it could have been done in a much nicer way! But perhaps I needed a jolt to really make me look at things more carefully.
Hi there
.
Loved your video! I will write down both the outer criticism and my inner, I haven’t done that for years, so thanks again
.
My biggest obstacles are my own inner one’s…I am aware of them, however they might take too much control from time to another, and they can prevent me from taking action on the small steps that I need to do,in order to reach my bigger goals.
I.e.; if I focus too much on how “perfect” everything has to be for me to reach my main goal, I’m already lost from the beginning…Because I might tend to overanalyze it, and make a chaotic mess in my head that I’m unable to reach my goal, because there are so many things that I need to do, and how will I be able to manage that?? I wan’t…So there’s no point in starting :-/…
Meaning, I can get stuck early in the process, and it makes me no good,..
What works the best for me, is that I have to be very structured with myself, and write down “baby-steps” from the beginning till the end, be patient with myself, be very aware of my inner critcs/saboteurs, and tell them to not to worry, thank them for trying to protecting me and move on! Celebrate each baby-step I’ve mastered and honor my values(i.e.spend time in Nature, take pictures, use music etc) through the whole process.
When dealing with outer critcism, I handle that differently. It all depends on what situation I’m in, how my relationship are to those giving the criticism to me, and what energy the criticism is carrying..
I use my intuition and senses in every case if I’m getting critics from others, and from there I will feel it if the critics are to bring out the best in me, or to hold me down. I also automatically check out a lot of different perspectives too. (I started to write here…, but bottom lined myself, lol..I could write so much.)
Many people also seem to project a lot of their own limitations on to others, or they think they’re helping you to not get hurt, make a fool on yourself, loose security of whatever…Then I ask myself; is this my beliefs, or the other persons? Asking questions can change the topic around too; are you saying this to lift me? Is this about me or you?, what if you asked me questions instead of telling me? etc. It all varies.
Anyway, hope this was helpful. Looking forward to more video’s.
Good luck with your workshop!!
Kari
I really liked the video! I think criticism is part of the real world and you have to be able to deal with both the negative and the positive
criticism that comes your way. Criticism from other people doesn’t really affect me as much as my own internal voice does.
so true about the passion path! people love criticizing!! i am going to post it on my page if it is ok…
I will make a list it tomorrow! Thank you so so much for this encouraging website! You inspire me 
Hi Corinna,
another excellent post – thanks – and I like the format. However, I often browse such posts in spare moments (on the train, etc.) when I have limited bandwidth (literally, not figuratively) so a link to a transcript would really help. All the best!
.-= James´s last blog ..Learnings from ALIA Europe =-.
Great debut Corrina – you have natural charisma, screen presence and….something else…what is it….oh yes I know…..you have PASSION!
I hate criticism if I’m honest…and I am now pretty good at recovering from the initial impact.
Why is it that the word criticism implies negative or bad or poor?
To answer that question I looked up the word critic and this is what it says
critic |ˈkritik|
noun
1 a person who expresses an unfavorable opinion of something : critics say many schools are not prepared to handle the influx of foreign students.
2 a person who judges the merits of literary, artistic, or musical works, esp. one who does so professionally : a film critic.
Now to me these are 2 very different perspectives on what a critic does – the first supports the view that criticism is almost always negative (unfavourable) and the second clearly states that a critic is someone who judges things (people and what they do) on their merits…and that surely is a good thing – because we need to know the merit of what we do…so that we can make changes and improvements…so really what we’re talking about is feedback…which should always be constructive as we know..
Anyway – you are a natural video star so keep broadcasting Corrina.
Love
Tony
Wise offerings here. I tend to avoid criticism in most of my actions. I think that is because most of what I do is very tied to what/who I think I am (i.e. there aren’t many things I do in life that I am not invested in). So, as you pointed out, they are often quite hurtful to me — since they relate to who I believe I am and where I want to go. I am learning to let things go in life and that’s a good place to start.
As for the format, I think it works, but also like being able to read through stuff. Perhaps consider alternating formats?
Hi Corinna
I found your comments very interesting. I’ve never been very good at accepting criticism and I think it is largely to do with how criticism links into my own insecurities about whatever I am trying to do. I am learning not to be such a ‘people pleaser’ and to not take critical comments so personally. If you step back and ask yourself if there is any truth in what has been said then you can use the criticism to your advantage to fine tune your ideas and make them better.
Decluttering people’s homes involves standing back and helping clients make decisions and choices about what to do with all their stuff. I feel that listing the criticisms voiced from outside as well as within is a similar process of making choices and decisions and can have an equally beneficial effect.
Hi Corinna,
Not much to criticise here! Great format and great to share your lovely face as well as your words.
I read a quote recently which really reinforces your point about the value of criticism as a form of learning, about ourselves and about the issues we care about.
‘Those have the right to criticise who have the heart to help’ (Abraham Lincoln)
Keep up the great work and your great passion,
Clayton
Hey Corrina,
Another great post – thought-provoking as ever! I agree with James that a transcript in conjunction with the video would be really good for reference purposes. For me, the video gets more heart across but the transcript gets more facts across. The video inspires whereas the transcript makes for a better reference (since it’s searchable etc).
Thanks again!
Hi, this really struck a chord this morning and I loved it thanks Corinna. I used to take all critisicm personally but have learned to listen to it and take something from it. Remember the stronger it is the more powerful you are! If somebody is taking time and energy to give their opinion there is obviously something about you that moves them (in whatever way). Sometimes too its the way its done thats upsetting (usually due to others not realising) I always TAP on that!
Feedback: Loved the video it felt personal, caring and helpful.
Sarah B xx
Hello Corrina
I really love video blogs, I find them really accessible, especially if you are trawling through a lot of emails! As a chronic fatigue sufferer, I love this site which utilizes video blogs very well- http://www.freedomfromme.co.uk/blog/.
Your own inner critic can be a source of fuel for your fears and agree, methods to “shine a light on them” is a good way of reducing this fuel and not allowing the fears to stop you in your tracks. I’m finding all my criticisms involve money eg “you’ll find it really hard to earn a living out of that”, “how will you ever attract enough clients” which are real concerns so I’m trying to learn from people who have been successful.
Cheers!
Hey Corrina
Great to see you trying out new ways of reaching out to your audience – I’m impressed by your powerful creativity. And in awe of your natural fluency: you didn’t seem to be reading any notes at all! That said, I personally find topics easier to absorb when they’re written, since it gives me the chance to reflect as I read.
Criticism… Hmmm. I’m a slow burner. When criticised, I freeze at first and go silent. But on reflection, I will absorb or reject what’s been said. How I handle the criticism partly depends on my own mood and confidence at the time, together with how much I respect the critic. But there’s always some learning in there.
Great video Corrina, thank you! You seem well suited to video posting and as others have indicated this format increases the potency of the already inspiring words you so kindly share with us
Whilst I think I am learning, slowly, to use other people’s criticism as constructive tools for growth, I often find this difficult if the criticism is particularly harsh, close to home or comes from someone whose opinion I care deeply about. The desire to defend myself comes up all too quickly when caught unaware but given the chance/time to think about a response allows for a more positive reaction.
Self-criticism on the other hand is a tougher nut to crack for me but trying to view myself as another person often helps. Does that make sense?!
I am learning lately that all negativity (whether physical, emotional or spiritual) is a tool for positive growth. It is how we view and react to it that can make the difference between an overwhelming crisis and a challenge overcome. Thanks again x
.-= Racheblue´s last blog ..The Story Of Bottled Water =-.
I love your video blog; felt very engaging and personal and natural. It can take real courage to put oneself out there like that and it made me feel even more that you are someone who really walks her talk Corrina.
I’ve also found that taking an inclusive approach to criticism is the healthiest thing for me in the long run, that I’m getting better at handling the impact it can have on me, and that as it feels like I’m starting to get REAL close to whatever it is I’m here to be & do the less worried and more open I am about seeking criticism for the kind of useful feedback that Tony describes.
And just to help me maintain a useful state for myself I do actively choose to censor some criticism. Sometimes I’m just not in the right kind of place to handle it without the cost being too high at that time. It’ll usually crop up again if it’s important.
Love your vid!
The thing I like to keep in mind about criticism is:
“what you think of me is what you think of you”.
Of course criticism can sometimes be used for self-improvement as long as you don’t take it personally, but it’s important to remember that the critical person is viewing you through the lens of their own perception, which doesn’t have much to do with you.
Wow. That was incredible!
I love the video format – I felt we could really connect with your passion, and compassion, in a way you can’t with written blogs. I’m quite moved! Thank you!
This seems to be a topic which resonates with a lot of people. I don’t deal with criticism particularly well – although I think I am improving! To be honest, a lot of my less-good incidents of dealing with criticism are to do with my underlying emotional and mental state. So I have learned, where possible, to try not to deal with them when I’m feeling vulnerable! Sounds easy, but it’s not always possible – especially in the middle of a ward round!
I suppose I’m slightly different to a lot of people that read your blog – I’m not starting my own venture – I’m in medical school learning to be a doctor. But I am the same in that I am trying to find a way to follow what I’m truly passionate about (people!! Especially children..) within a system that is becoming less and less able to allow doctors to follow that passion truly. It’s tough. And I have lots of doubts about my ability to slot into this system. And lots of internal (and occasional external) critics – mainly about my ability to be a good doctor and about how my compassionate, human-centred ‘soft’ side will fit into the evidence-based NHS. We’ll see!
The bottom line is, for me, having a focus. That is – my dream of being a paediatrician and improving lives. And, to look at the evidence. To deal with people – often me – telling me that I’m not cut out for it etc. I look at the evidence. And actually, the evidence is that I can be good at both medicine and ‘people’. People appreciate the ‘human touch’ as much as the medical competence. Receiving thank-you cards from new mothers I’d been with for 15 hours in their labour and delivery of their new family member was one of the most affirming things to happen in my 5 years at medical school.
Sorry if this is a bit waffly – I guess you really touched on something. It is definitely harder to take criticism when you really care about the outcome. But I guess equally, you have more passion to fight the critics with when it really matters.
Thanks again Corrina.
Chu xx
Crikey, I go away for a day and look at all these juicy comments! Thank you SO much – it’s always a vulnerable moment when you try something new and this was one of those moments so I fully appreciate the support and feedback I’ve received.
Emma: Thank you! And yes, get that torch out
Catie (Mum!): Seeing criticism as a necessary jolt… Did it lead you to review your working practices in a self-critical way or a self-compassionate way? Either way, how was the review helpful?
Kari: What wisdom you share here! I really get that you have loads to say about this – THANK YOU – and have you blogged about it or shared this wisdom yourself elsewhere? I’m so glad the writing-down action feels beneficial. It sounds like you’ve really made this a journey and have found effective way of dealing with your Inner Critic – that in large part for you it’s about breaking down into bite-sized chunks both the criticism AND the action steps. Your ‘thanking the critics’ bit inspires me to post a link to this blog post, in case you haven’t yet read it: http://youinspireme.co.uk/2009/whos-in-charge-understanding-redirecting-our-inner-guardian/
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
Laura: With your perspective on criticism being “It’s part of the real world” I can almost hear a shrug in your voice, like “Yeah, so what”
It sounds relaxed and mellow – very accepting. What perspective on your Internal Critic could you take that would give you a similar feeling? Something like “It’s part of being human”, or “Oh yes, you again”? 
Victoria: Yes you can certainly post to your page – I’d love that, thank you. People can subscribe to receive future posts themselves by entering their name and email address in the boxes top left of this website. “People love criticizing”… why do you think this is?
James: Thanks, feedback noted. I think I’ll create a mixture of written & video posts in the future. If someone wants to volunteer to transcribe the video posts, please feel free!
Tony: Well thanks, you enthusiastic lovely one! So… for you, an honest “This AND that” approach – “I hate it AND I can recover”. Yes, criticism and feedback feel like very different words. Sounds like a strong perspective that we can take: “Criticism is Feedback – which I can choose to view as helpful”
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
Tony: Just a little more…
The criticism that was thrown at the workshop participant (that I talk about in the video) certainly didn’t feel like feedback. It felt like an attack – which felt much more about HER than about her offering the participant anything. I guess we’re looking at two very distinct ‘come from’ places.
Anne: Yes, alternating formats feels like a good way forward, thank you. What would it be like for you if you didn’t feel you had to avoid criticism? What different actions might you take?
Chris: Ah so you have that ‘standing back’ skill already from your work… great that you can apply/translate that to doing that with criticism, both internal & external. Nice metaphor of clutter as paralleled to our own ‘stuff’
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
Clayton: Oh go on, have a little bit of criticism, I can take it
Thanks for the quote – again, it’s about: why is this person criticizing me? Are they giving feedback that’s offered generously, that might be hard to hear but useful nonetheless? Or are they intending to be mean and to attack – which is different BUT I still get to choose see it as a gift!
Ben: Fancy transcribing?
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
Sarah B: Ah so you use EFT (‘tapping’) on the upsetting thoughts? That’s a useful strategy, thanks for sharing. You’re talking about it as energy, so not ‘negative’ or ‘positive’ per se but rather something with power – very interesting indeed, thanks so much for sharing.
Claire: Thank you for sharing that link. By coincidence, I’ve worked with three clients over the years who (had) experienced chronic fatigue so if they’re reading, they might find that site helpful. Yes video can be a nice breath of fresh air – more ‘alive’ than writing in this age of many, many emails! Reading your comment I get the metaphor of starving a fire of oxygen: shining the light on the criticism can take the wind out of your fears. And love what you’re doing re: seeking out evidence to feed those fearful parts, offering other perspectives on e.g. earning ££ doing what you love.
Andrew: Nope, no notes
And it was one of those things where I could have recorded it another a hundred times and none of them would have been perfect, i just had to say “That’s good enough” – a nice powerful perspective to take on criticism as it happens! Interesting about the different stages of responding to criticism: the initial reaction and then the later response. And the other variables involved: your mood and your feelings about the person criticizing.
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
Racheblue: Ah thank you! And yes it certainly does make sense re: seeing that Inner Critic as like a different person. We use that strategy a lot in coaching: we name different parts of ourselves (Saboteur, Guardian, Future Self) to explore options and come-from places and so that ultimately we get to choose which part of us we want to be driven from. Again, it’s not about censoring but rather integrating and taking a holistic approach – one where we’re in charge. Thanks for sharing your insights here, much appreciated.
Nick: Thank you, thank you. What a beautiful thing to say. And right back at you – I want to acknowledge how you model the concept of JOURNEY – how you always share how you are getting on with applying a particular principle or technique, and how you move from one space to another. Interesting that the more ON your passion you are, the LESS you bother with criticism. Maybe there’s that tipping point you get to… It hurts on the way up the hill but once you’re over the hill, your passion is far too important and ‘known’ to let criticism knock you off track. Rather it’s: “okay, bring it on because I am on the downhill now”
KB: Yes! I can almost feel in your comment how someone could throw something at you and you’d just let it slide off. Magnificent. Thank you for showing up here – I feel somewhat starstruck because you are the QUEEN of video blogs!
VeganChu: Wow, love that you felt moved. I think you really sum it up beautifully: “It is definitely harder to take criticism when you really care about the outcome. But I guess equally, you have more passion to fight the critics with when it really matters.” You are already one of the most powerful doctors I’ve ever known – and you’re clearly already gathering other evidence (the thank-you cards for example!) which stands with its own weight when the Critics get noisy. Thank you for commenting here – my approach is for anyone who is wanting support with the journey of finding and following their passion (rather than getting stuck in unfulfilling work) so you are MOST welcome here
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
I love the siege of comments!
And I love the permission you give yourself to be flexible with your format and adapt it to what works for you at any given time… Thank you for taking the risk to try out this one. It definitely works and I noticed that I was more motivated to actually tackle the “action steps” when you suggest them “in person” than when I read them at the end of the blog.
Interestingly, about 30 mins before I watched this I was reflecting on my I had been annoyed yesterday when my partner told me he had mentioned a project I’m working on to a mutual friend. He knew that I had asked him not to mention it to people just yet but his mouth got there first
I realised that fundamentally, my request to not share the information yet was that it is a very ambitious project and it feels at too vulnerable a stage to receive any feedback: basically I am wanting to avoid criticism as I’m afraid I will get discouraged.
But then a light went on: in avoiding the possible criticism, I’m also closing myself off to possible encouragements from others!!!
And now your vid shines the light on it even brighter: In taking a “safe” route I’m avoiding all sorts of possible opportunities and outcomes…
EEEEEEK! Time to come out of the closet, methinks!!!
Thanks for opening the window and letting the breeze in… BIG LOVE
Vaishnavi: You’ve got to experiment, right? Like at the moment I’ve started offering coaching sessions by Facebook Chat or Google Chat – to play with different formats – and it REALLY suits some people. So yes, lots of permission to shift and evolve. Very interesting that me speaking the action steps to you face-to-face motivates you more. And what an insight about the two-sided no criticism/no encouragement coin. Here’s to light and breeze and BIG LOVE to your journey with this new project.
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..No Bad Parts: How To Handle Criticism & Other Attacks =-.
You rock, Corrina. That is all.
.-= Mark SIlver´s last blog ..The Nitty Gritty Heart: Jonathan Fields =-.
Ah, lovely video Corrina! Well done you ..
And I feel sooo aligned with what you’re saying about not leaving our passions for an evening hobby – that it brought tears to my eyes. Yes I AM still in a job I hate …while trying to discover and develop income streams based on my passions ..
Criticism – well criticism in my day job serves to remind me that I AM NOT YET able to devote all my time to the things I AM passionate about – and I find it wearing and depressing – it kickstarts me into a reality I’m not happy with and yet feel trapped in … is exhausting and I get really angry
Criticism directed at ventures that align with my passions – well they’ve been more generic than venture specific I suppose – from within, that I don’t have the stamina, that I don’t have the contacts, that I hate planning and logistics!
And from outside – things like that I’m not a true entrepreneur, that I’m not hard-working enough – that I haven’t got what it takes to put in long hours …. oh loads of unsupporting negative energy bearing brickbats slung at me. These too are “wear-me-down” exhausting!
How do I deal with them? Hmmmm, sometimes I just carry on regardless. Sometimes I simply shut down and disengage for a while – daydream or whatever … sometimes I get said, sometimes I get angry, sometimes I get exhausted – and occasionally I get creative and inspired
I do recommend your Kickstart your Venture course – true, I AM still struggling to overcome new obstacles I keep finding – and I am also trying to kickstart 2 ventures! What I got most from the course was evidence that people do want what I’m wanting to offer! That in itself is like gold-dust and diamonds. A bright sparkly gem … thank you Corrina and my co-students from the January day! xx Annie
.-= Annie Wigman´s last blog ..Release from the Binds of “Either / Or” =-.
Corrina- you did it! You shamed me into acting. Here it is: Too Much Ambition. Thank you for getting me off my duff with this.
.-= Mark SIlver´s last blog ..The Nitty Gritty Heart: Jonathan Fields =-.
Thanks so much for this video! Very well done and some great points!
We are just starting out and definitely have our own criticisms in our heads and that we’ve discussed with each other!
Right now, we’re trying to get people to give us any feedback we can get! They are shy for now! We are planning on sending out a survey to our facebook fans to get some feedback on our new site.
We WANT criticism! Some of it may hurt, but it is definitely the way to grow!
I am so glad I “found” this today! Thanks to Mark Silver for the email pointing to this site! I’m signing up for updates!
Annie – I really feel how much pain is here for you and I know also that you’re a woman of great passion and vision and that you sincerely want to help people with your venture(s). I wonder what today’s blog post, about deep inner listening to wisdom within, might have to contribute here?
Thank you also for your recommendation of the Kickstart Your Venture workshop. It was wonderful to spend that time with you as our participant and to see you sharing your insights with others, and also receiving that ‘gold dust’ from them.
Mark – I have the biggest smile on my face! YOU rock!
Thank you so much for sharing and for allowing us to see you as close to in-person as we can get from this side of the pond.
Shawna – Ah yes, being HUNGRY for criticism! Bring it on – it’s all feedback. The story which inspired this blog post, about someone being exceptionally mean and personally attacking, has led that person to find so much inner strength. “If I can handle what you throw at me, then who knows what I can accomplish?” Do post a link to your project – I’m sure some people reading this blog would be happy to offer you the feedback you’re wanting…
.-= Corrina´s last blog ..Who’s Your Boss Really? A Deeper Level Of Decision-Making =-.
Wow! Dynamic presentation. I have tons of internal critics and those are so much more damaging than those from others. I don’t need to have anyone tell me what they don’t like about me–I’ve already filled in the blanks for them. Although that’s still somewhat true, I realize it isn’t as strong as it once was. That causes me to want to understand why it’s not as severe as it once was. I think it has to do with some great coaching I’ve been getting and recognizing that I’m as perfect as I need me to be. That may not make any sense but it works for me, somehow.
Thanks for giving me something so interesting to ponder and clarify my thoughts.
Cynthia – Ah my pleasure, I’m so glad the video was helpful – and good to hear that the inner criticism is not as strong for you as it was. “I’m as perfect as I need me to be” sounds like a useful affirmation
It was fabulous to get to listen to you! I notice that if the criticism is totally ridiculous, I simply become curious about it, because I know its not true. If the criticism is close to one I think too (even subconsciously), I can be more wounded.
Thanks Corrina!
Leslie Avon Miller´s last [type] ..The Most Important Art Tool
Ah thanks Leslie – and good to see your face in your gravatar too! Every level of connection brings something new. Delighted you enjoyed the video. I wonder what would help you get curious about the close-to-home criticism as well….?
Hello I’m loving your blog, you’re really good at this.
Well, i think criticism is a form of attack when you can see that it’s negative, this means it’s not meant to help you..it’s just to arm you. If you have a low self esteem almost every critic comes as an attack.
I noticed that when i believe a little less in myself that critics are harsher and sometimes I just loose my will to do whatever I want to do. If i can understand the critic and think i can do better, i feel like working hard, but if i can’t see another solution..i just stop. Sometimes critics, even if they’re suppose to help you, can block you. At least this is what happens to me. And i have the same problem that Kari has.
I’m an Art student so you can understand how much critic i have to handle and i really don’t want to be part of a world that it’s mostly fake, where people are smiling just to get something. But if i want to share my art ..i guess i have to deal with this right?
So i guess that’s why i saw the video and i must say that i liked it. I’m going to make a list.
Thank you very much Carrina – and commenters – I’ve only recently found your site following a facebook link for your 12 steps to business heaven teleclass (have downloaded recording but not listened properly yet), and started browsing your blogs in short time slots.. I’m really enjoying them and the comments as well, as finding thought-provoking and supportive. Useful links too eg to the Hub (which I looked at and felt quite shocked seeing how much is being innovated ‘out there’, it really highlighted how I’ve been hiding myself & I felt self-critical plus envious)
I still find criticism very difficult, although there is improvement. I notice that there can be a number of positive comments and one negative and it’s the negative that I’ll be most aware of, tho learning to make effort to balance the picture, as I would easily do for my mum or a friend. A ‘critical’ comment seems to cause a contraction in my insides and trigger a deep seated fear that somehow it’s a total rejection, so I’m practising knowing everyone makes mistakes and it’s fine, it’s actually how we develop (that great quote, something like: ‘show me someone who makes no mistakes and I’ll show you someone who doesn’t make anything!’
Feedback is SO important, and having done Turning Point course (www.soulpurpose.org) I’m finding more and more that there’s usually a huge relief in honest speaking, both ways, and strangely can bring people much closer even if it’s really scarey and does hurt, as long as it’s said with positive intention. An agreement to speak and receive openly makes it much easier, as does an understanding that we create all our experiences for our growth.
I find the NVC (Non Violent Communication) model very helpful too, that we can be having “giraffe ears” ie hearing accurately or “jackal ears” when we hear our own version of what’s been said, and which can mean we hear criticism/feel criticised when no criticism was intended. Basically it comes down to feeling separate doesn’t it? – if we feel at one with the other person there is no feeling of adversary and nothing to defend from or attack. And feeling unconditionally lovable, loved simply for being rather than what we do means that any criticism is about an action, not about us personally.
Oops I’ve got rather carried away with this – very relevant and interesting area to investigate. Thanks again. Judith
Judith – You are so welcome here! Thanks for sharing – I know lots of others reading will identify with what you say. And yes there are fantastic inspirational happenings afoot, it’s just about tuning in to them
Stay connected and keep reaching out – we’re all in this together.
I really loved the video – it meant that I could benefit from your wisdom whilst doing the washing up – always a bonus! I find that I am getting critcised on all fronts at the moment; from my husband who is worried that i am not earning much yet (and who quite rightly is feeling the financial pressure of that) to my mum who worries about me in general, always! And then it’s mainly my internal criticism, which is the most daft – I always run anything I do in my head against the ‘too wacky’ standard of my exboyfriends dad! insane! this has really helped me a lot! thank you!
Claire – Haha delighted to accompany you with your washing up! I’m sorry to hear you’re experiencing such an onslaught of both internal & external criticism. You’re certainly not alone in that and it reminds me of this great saying: “No-one said this journey would be easy; they said it would be worth it”.
In terms of not earning much yet, hopefully you’ll find some helpful frameworks suggested in the other blog posts here, as well as the 3 x free audio classes you can access at:
http://youinspireme.co.uk/writing-and-audio/audio/
Stay connected!
Corrina Gordon-Barnes´s last [type] ..Whose Money Don’t You Want